Machine Gun Kelly is Benjamin Caldwellgetting honest about generational trauma.

The 34-year-old, whose real name is Colson Baker, recently discussed how his father, at the age of 9 years old, stood trial alongside his mother for thedeath of his father and her husband—and how the events not only affected MGK’s dad, but also how that trauma echoed into his own childhood.

“The story that was told to me was always that their dad dropped the gun and his head essentially blew off,” MGK explained on the August 5 episode of the Dumb Blonde podcast. “And so that all happened in the room with my dad at 9 years old. Him and my grandmother were tried for the murder. They were both acquitted.”

But it’s only as the musician has gotten older, that he was able to understand the ways in which these traumatic events left their impact on his father.

“I just remember that I always used to get so mad at him when I was a kid, because if I scared him or he heard a loud boom or a loud noise, he would freak out, like gnarly freak out,” MGK reflected. “And I would be like, ‘You're supposed to be a man, dude, like why are you acting like this?’ And it just made me hate him. But then you sit there and you think about a kid who was on trial at nine years old for the murder of his father.”

The Grammy nominee has also realized, with time, how these events affected his own life.

“My father's childhood journey definitely bled into mine,” he noted. “I think I've projected myself to be somebody who has the stamina to endure all of these things that come with fame and criticism and hate. Because I fought back with all those traumas by becoming what I always wanted my dad to be, which was like tough and shake everything off and just fight anyone who comes at you.”

But as he noted, his choices have been unsustainable long-term. “I'm just now fixing myself,” MGK continued. “And I don't have the energy to be the image that I was.”

This is not the first time the “Emo Girl” artist has opened up about his family’s difficult history. In his 2022 documentary Life in Pink, MGK had a conversation with his daughter Casie Baker, now 15, about the events.

“It's crazy 'cause they actually took my dad to trial at 9 years old,” he says in the documentary, per People, while reading a newspaper article about the 1968 events. "'Cause he never took a chance to heal, all that stuff, it came out on me as I grew up."

And the conversation clearly shifted Casie’s perspective on her father, as she noted, “I can see why my dad was so depressed, 'cause like, it kind of passed on through generations to him."

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